The Recipe for Success is not dissimilar to The Recipe for ‘Lean.

Next time you’re headed to a studio session to work on your personal project starting at 10pm, and you want things to head in an even weirder direction than they already are, then try this! It worked for me…

The anticipation on any given day that I’m headed to work in the studio is typically similar to the anticipation that a kid feels when going to Six Flags on his first day of Summer: Maximum Stoke Level Orange. Granted, my career is that of a musician. I’m constantly in and out of the studio. Shit, I have one in my house. But the frequency of being able to be behind the red light and lost inside of a new idea never overshadows my basic juvenile enthusiasm for it.

I’ve been working on a (cringe) “solo project” with my dear friend, Adam Lasus. He’s made things with Clap Your Hands Say Yeah, Daniel Johnston, PJ Harvey, Helium, Orbans, etc. I know, right?! Anyways, we’ve been starting the sessions pretty late at night, as that’s the most creative time for me personally. Needless to say, I was beyond psyched last night as the ideas were channeling from my brain to my hands to the instrument through the speakers and then back into my ears. Its the Circle of Life and I’m Simba.

Me, apparently high on 'lean, recording guitar for the Son of Stan record

Here’s where the extra weird part comes in. Though my mind was racing and I was as happy as a cartoon pig in chocolate pudding jumping from axe to axe following the muse (barf), my body didn’t seem to be joining the party. I mean I was weak. I could barely move, and I knew something was wrong. I started thinking to myself: “Is that last kick ass DI guitar part I just put down actually making me have a stroke? What the fuck is happening?” I started kind of freaking out. And I say ‘kind of’ because it was the most polite, subdued and mellow slow motion freak out that anyone could imagine… mushrooms not included. Ok. Why am I excited? Because I’m making cool things. Ok. Why can I barely move? Um…this one I couldnt figure it out. I was scared. Not really. But kind of.

Then it hit me. Eureka. (note the lack of exclamation after ‘Eureka’). It hit me Like a ton of clay bricks. If clay bricks were made out of pillows. And if a ton were 6. Before I left my house I was feeling a bit ‘run down’ and though I typically dont like pounding medicines, I knew I would need to be cleared up so I could sing my musical numbers into the recording microphone with at least marginal success…So I opened my medicines cabinet, grabbed the multi pack DayQuil/NyQuil box, fussed with the childproof foil mechanism and swallowed two gelcaps as quick as Keanu. But my child, I did not take the DayQuil pills necessary to traverse the next 6 hours of rock and roll philadelhpia-style freedom. I dopeishly took the Beddytime johns. I mean, green means go, right? Nope. Green means later bitch. That shit is strong.

Couch-locked on the same davenport that has also graced Juliana Hatfield’s and PJ Harvey’s rear situations, I realized the error of my ways…Panicked, as to not lose my momentum, I immediately downed a) 1 bottle of orange crystal geyser carbonated water b) 1/2 a bar of 90% cocoa chocolate and c) a giant mug of Trader Joe’s organic Green Tea what-not…As you can imagine my recipe for combatting my failing vitals didnt exactly work like a charm, but rather aided in my already severe case of crazy head. And though my throat was clear, my stomach was now simultaneously as full as my bladder.

I continued to work, fighting the Alice In wonderland dream like scenario, being eternally enthused and grateful but outwardly took the appearance of just shy of Edgar Allen Poe, post opium binge.

Turns out, however, that what transpired after the melee definitely proved to be the coolest musical moment of the session so far.

So, what I’m saying is: Do Drugs! Not really. But whatever. If you want. I’m not a role model.


Happy New Fear!!!

May your 2012 be free of Post-Consumer paranoia and at the same time filled with beautiful melody and harmony! All the love there is…. xo Jorts aka son of stan…

MERRY XMAS! – MY DEFINITIVE ‘Best Of Music 2011’ List

Happy Holidays Friends! Family! Planet Animals! Plant Life! As my Secret Santa gift to all of you, may I present my ‘Best Of’ list in Music for 2011. First, I’ll list my favorite albums, then favorite songs, then I’ll list a couple Oldies But Goodies. Lots of killer ladies in the mix this year! I’ll keep the list it to just the audio world here, though I will tell you that the best movie I saw last year was ‘Too Big to Fail’ on HBO, and my favorite TV Show was ‘American Horror Story’. It was the only show I watched. Funny how that works.



This is my favorite record of the year. I thank my pal Larry Sheffey (aka Chutie Moreno, aka Shandy Randy, aka lil Faust) for turning me on to these Maryland natives.

2. St. Vincent – Strange Mercy

My second favorite record of the year. Annie Clark is a brilliant writer, wields an axe as strong and as tough as Prince (see the ripping direct tone of “Surgeon”) and happens to also be from the North Texas Area. Much Love.

3. Twin Sister – In Heaven

I love these kids from Long Island. Intensely dreamy and smooth. Their song “All Around and Away We Go” was my favorite song of 2010, and this new record is stronger than previous efforts. They can play their instruments pretty well.

Continue reading “MERRY XMAS! – MY DEFINITIVE ‘Best Of Music 2011’ List”

My Interview with Drunk History Creator Derek Waters, Creator of ‘Drunk History’

Welcome back guys. To kick off my interview series, “Tell Me Something”, we’ve got my friend Derek Waters. To call Derek a ‘funny man’ would be false. Wait, I mean, to call Derek a ‘funny man’ would be an understatement…we’ve all seen his creation ‘Drunk History’ on YouTube, most likely while drunk and on YouTube. For those of you that have been living under a rock, in this case a Compaq laptop, then you can watch the brand new episode of Drunk History, starring Ryan Gosling, Jim Carrey and Eva Mendes!


Do you have the ability to create on a consistent basis, or do you find that most ideas come in those rare ‘flashes of genius’?

Hi Jordan. I just wanted to say that.

Luckily I always have an idea for something, but that doesn’t mean it’s a good one.

The problem is getting them done, and or in a place I’m happy with.

Not knowing if an idea is good or not is tough.

I’ve found the way of knowing if an idea is working or not, is when it won’t get out of my head. The ones that don’t work, are the ones I can’t remember. At least I hope those ideas weren’t gonna work. Damn, maybe I wish I could remember them.

Continue reading “My Interview with Drunk History Creator Derek Waters, Creator of ‘Drunk History’”

Last Night in Brazil….Courtesy of Long Island, NY

Greetings from The Copacabana. Literally. It’s been an incredible tour down here over the past 10 days. Just minutes from Ipanema Beach, and my soul longs to hear something smooth, and frankly un-bossa related to send me off, finally, to dreamland. Tonight’s sleep-soundtrack comes from Long Island’s very own Twin Sister. The cool kids over at just put this up. It’s called ‘Stop’ and its off of their new album, ‘In Heaven’. Highly Suggested, obvee. Lots of cool stuff originates from Long Island… like my two friends, Kahlea Baldwin and Art Scotti. This is for them. Boa noite e sonhos cor de rosa!

We’re All An American Band!

Brazil is rich with an incredible musical tradition. Toddlers here have more rhythm than any given member of the U.S. Senate (except maybe Dick Durbin). But sometimes I just can’t help but crave the Flag-wrapped, Freedom-dipped sound of a ’71 Malibu-Delivered large slice of Kick-Ass-American-Aural-Pie. Pour yourself a Bud and enjoy.

“We should become more artificial”… Bem vindo ao Brasil, Jordan.

I arrived to my final destination, Porto Alegre, Brasil, several hours ago, after nearly 24 hours of travel. There’s nothing like spending an entire day to make a journey. How many days have I spent not even getting out of bed until half of it is over, just to let the other half pass by seemingly unnoticed? The answer is: at least as many as I’ve spent making my way somewhere across the globe in that same amount of time.

Every emotion is pulled out of you through stimulation and exhaustion when you travel. Not to say that we don’t experience every synapse firing during an otherwise “mundane” set of 24 hours, but securing yourself in a tube and hurling across a hemisphere or allowing time to pass while sitting at a busy airport gate or staring out of the window of a van at a South American ghetto are all definite recipes for self-reflection on the “What does it all mean” notion. At least to me…I’m sure when Asian nomads spent a day on the Pacific heading east or when early American settlers spent the same amount of time going the opposite direction that they let the same question ‘brown and serve’ in their mind ovens as well.

So it’s fitting that when I arrived, after reaching out to those I love, like my girlfriend and family back home, that I would be in a mode of reflective discovery. And alone in a Hotel room. Armed with substantial-at-best Wi-Fi. It happens every tour. That’s how, ahem, Rock and Roll Go, to us sensitive types.

And just then, like a mystical gift in my inbox, my enlightened friend David Stokes sends me this…!

Uneasy Childhood Memory Of The Week – 1986’s ‘Babes in Toyland’

We’ve all got them…those childhood-obsessions-of-the-fantastic from another time, long, long ago. And most of the time when we go back and revisit them, they totally scare the shit out of us. I mean, all of us early-30-somethings can remember as children being terrified of that little prick toddler, Gage, from ‘Pet Sematary’, but when we go back and look at it today it just makes us a) chuckle, at best and b) realize that Herman Munster was the same guy in ‘My Cousin Vinny’. But the REALLY terrifying WTF material, that haunts our dreams today as adults, always seem to be the things from our childhood that we adored most. This brings me to today’s first installment of a Son Of Stan segment I call “Uneasy Childhood Memory Of The Week”.

In keeping with the festive time of year, I give you scenes from 1986’s Made for NBC vehicle “Babes in Toyland”, starring an adolescent and possibly drug-addled Drew Barrymore (looking babe as ever), the ever-confused hunk Keanu Reeves (looking confused as ever), and personal favorite Hollywood Hall-of-Famer, Richard Mulligan, who no doubt shot this on the Universal backlot during breaks from his busy ‘Empty Nest’ shooting schedule. I LOVED THIS MOVIE when I was 7 years old. Pretty sure I wore out the VHS. This shit is rull scary, yall. Straight Maniacal. Try to sleep normal after watching this.

*Take special Peep of Barnaby’s (Mulligan) hinchmen. Honorable mention goes out to Barrymore’s sick sled moves…And Oh yea, Pat Morita is there to give wise Asian sage-like advice. Imagine That!

He put the ‘Stan’ in “Son Of Stan”

Happy Birthday to my Dad, Stan!!

To celebrate, it would be great if maybe some of you could eat turkey today. It’s his favorite ground fowl. Thanks!

(l-r: son of stan w/ beard of jordan, daughter of stan, stan)

Here’s a video on the making of his favorite song of all time, explained by the uber-cerebral and facially-haired duo, themselves…my gift to all of you, for my Dad.

My Instructional Video ‘Drum It Like It’s Hot’ — TRAILER!!! Early XMAS CORN!

Santa came early this year! Probably due to confusion stemming from age-related senility and a poor diet. But nonetheless, he came early and brought these toys for all you boys and girls: A “stocking” (in this case, my new website that you’re currently fawning over) filled with a delicious “chocolate orange” (or trailer to my upcoming drum instructional video). So everyone wile’ out and get fresh. get real. get spirited away. Praise Santa! Praise Him!